Happy September! Another summer is coming to an end, the nights are starting to draw in and I have to admit for the first time in I can remember I am actually going to miss the summer and I have what can only be described as the summer blues.
If you read my post ‘Diet Culture is the Reason Why‘ (if you didn’t you can find it by clicking on the following link http://wix.to/dkDuCJQ?ref=2_cl) you will know I was really struggling going into the summer. The old insecurities were creeping back and try as I might, no matter what I did, the insecurities just kept growing. It was all getting to much. I even had to take a break from blogging and my social media. This helped and after taking a bit of time out, I had realised that I had to stop putting so much pressure on myself and came to terms with the idea that it was ok that my first summer as an Intuitive eater wasn’t going to be as uplifting and as freeing as I had hoped but just being able to face my insecurities and acknowledge them was going to be enough. That for me was a big win and one I was very happy to take!
What I did not expect though was to discover that actually writing my previous blog post would prove to become very therapeutic. Admitting to how I was feeling, to not only all of you but also to myself seemed to kind of pull me completely out of the funk I was in.
I didn’t even notice it at first, but a couple of weeks into the summer holidays I realised put of nowhere that there amazingly had been no insecurities, no worries and no real self body shaming! I was actually enjoying my summer and I hadn‘t even noticed. It was a big surprise to realise that this summer hadn’t become that of summers past as I had been expecting it to. It dawned on me that in all likelihood it was my expectations that had been the cause of previous insecurities. Not only that I also realised that I was actually further along in my journey than I had thought. Winning!!
Of course there was the odd moment where I would be unsure of my choice of clothes that day or I would question how I looked in a photo, but these feelings were there for the shortest time and I was able to shrug them off.
I have to admit though, I have not actually put on a swimming costume this summer, which has always been one of my biggest worries. But only because the weather in England has been pretty poor and sadly we have had no beach days, so that is still something that slightly scares me but I’m hoping when the time comes, I will again surprise myself and be able to overcome those insecurities.
So all in all it turned out that I had an amazing summer which I had really not been expecting! I was totally present for every moment, my kids said they had the best time with me which was everything! I even tried activities that the old Kat would never dreamed of doing! (Click on my Instagram at Instagra.com/rediscovering_my_intuition to find out what they were)
For the first time in a very long time the smiles you can see in my photos are genuine and it turned out this summer became the uplifting summer that I had only ever dreamed off before. Literally the best summer ever and I am sad to say goodbye to it. As always thank you for reading, stay safe and happy eating.